What's your number one question about personal development?


Why Affirming The Inherent Goodness Of Our Kids Can Transform Parenting: The Power Of The 'My Kids Are Not Bad' Mindset

By Jose Lizama

Updated on Monday 29th of May 2023

What's your number one question about self-improvement?


Parenting can be an incredibly challenging task, with its fair share of highs and lows. While the joys of watching our children grow and thrive brings us immense happiness, the constant criticism and comparison from society can often make us feel inadequate as parents. In this world where our kids' behavior is always being scrutinized and compared to others, it can be easy to internalize negative labels, such as 'my kid is bad.'

However, here is the good news: we have the power to change this narrative and affirm our children as inherently good. This shift in perspective has the potential to transform not only how we parent but also how our children see themselves.

When we affirm our children's inherent goodness, we recognize that their behavior is not a reflection of their character but is merely a byproduct of their environment, emotions, and circumstances. It allows us to reframe our beliefs about our children's behavior and helps us focus on their positive qualities, strengths, and unique personalities. Just imagine how this simple shift in perspective can make a big difference in how we view and connect with our children.

One way to affirm our children's inherent goodness is to set realistic expectations. Instead of striving for perfection, which is often unattainable, we need to evaluate our expectations and ensure that they align with our children's age, abilities, and needs. When we set unrealistic expectations, we set our children up for failure, which can be demoralizing and erode their self-esteem. This, in turn, can lead to negative behavior that can, unfortunately, confirm the negative narrative that society pushes onto us.

Another way to affirm our children's inherent goodness is to focus on their strengths rather than their weaknesses. Every child has their own unique personality and strengths that we can nurture and celebrate. By focusing on our children's strengths, we can help them develop a positive self-image, which can motivate them to excel in a particular area. This can also improve their overall self-worth and help them understand that they are an asset to the world rather than a burden.

When we affirm our children's inherent goodness, we also need to realize that we are not perfect parents. Parenting is a lifelong learning process, and we will make mistakes. It's essential to acknowledge our mistakes and apologize when necessary. This helps us model good behavior while also teaching our children that it's okay to make mistakes. Moreover, when we admit our mistakes and shortcomings, we open up honest communication channels with our children, improving our relationships.

In conclusion, affirming our children's inherent goodness is a game-changer in parenting. It helps us to reframe our beliefs about our children's behavior, allowing us to focus on their strengths and unique personalities. This shift in perspective helps us build stronger, more positive relationships with our children, improving their self-esteem and overall well-being. So, just imagine the tremendous impact that affirming our children's inherent goodness can make in shaping their future.

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